Friend or Fiendish Canine/Quotes
- (The Turner's House)
- (the sun rises; Timmy wakes up)
- Timmy: (yawns) Another weekend is here. No school, (tears a picture of Vicky in half) no sour sweet 16 babysitting me anymore, just a nice relaxing weekend with friends, family and fairies.
- (jumps off the bed and fell on a pile of dirt; Timmy breaks free of the dirt and spits it out of his mouth)
- Timmy: A pile of dirt all over my bedroom floor?! This can only mean one thing.
- (Timmy turns his head; camera points to the window showing Sparky taking off)
- Timmy: (opens his window) Stupid dog! You're making my morning look bad!
- (Cosmo, Wanda and Poof as fish swim out of the castle)
- Wanda: Let me guess, Sparky again?
- Timmy: Who else?
- Cosmo: Well, to be honest, I was sleep floating last night and thought I was helping Wanda's father with his lawn.
- Timmy: Sparky has gotten even worse now that he's with the L.O.S.E.R.S.! It's every weekend I have to put up with this!
- Poof: Can't be worse then the last few weekends.
- (flashback #1)
- Daran: Well done, Squirrely Scouts. You've done well achieving your "Go through two days without eating" badge. (pulls out a big bag) I think you earn a reward.
- Scouts: Yay!
- (Daran pulls the zipper releasing the food which turns out to be stale dog chow full of dog drool)
- (Scouts disgustingly moan)
- Timmy: (to himself) Sparky!
- (flashback #2)
- (Britain)
- (Timmy stands near Brianna's vault)
- Timmy: Okay, now that your vault is safe back home, let's crack it open to make sure nothing is missing. (cracks the vault) Now, what we have here is...
- (fleas pop out)
- Ivan: Fleas!?
- (the fleas jump all over Chloe, Trixie, Brianna and Charlotte as they try to run away from them)
- Brianna: Eww! Eww!
- (the fleas bite them turning them into dogs)
- Chloe: Werf! Werf!
- Timmy: Magical fleas!? Sparky!
- (flashback #3)
- (Fairy World)
- (Billy Crystal Ball onstage)
- Billy Crystal Ball: And that's how The April Fool got his name. He was born in April and acts like a fool every day.
- (everyone even the April Fool laughs)
- The April Fool: That's what's up with that. It's funny because it's true!
- Billy Crystal Ball: Hope you all enjoy the show. Your chocolate pudding standing on your desks is my way of thanking you all for coming.
- (everyone opens their mouths about to eat their pudding when they were all heard off-screen spitting and gagging)
- Astronov: This is dog doo!
- (Neptunia bends down throwing up)
- Cosmo: That's even worse than Reindeer chocolate!
- Timmy: (echo) Spaaaaarkyyyyy!!!!
- (flashbacks over)
- Timmy: I've had it! We need to think of a way to get Sparky off our backs if we want to survive another weekend.
- Cosmo: I'm way ahead of you, man. We just need nip, a bowl of milk, and thirty ton pile of yarn and Sparky's off our case forever.
- Wanda: Those things are for cats.
- Cosmo: Hey, that sounds even easier. We poof up hundreds of them for Sparky.
- Poof: Even if we do that, he'll come right back with his mischief.
- Nataliya: (heard) Oh, Timmy, breakfast!
- Timmy: We'll think of something. Right now, I need to get eating.
- (walks out of his bedroom door)
- Timmy: (heard) Uh, what's with the torn up mail woman clothes?
- Timantha: (heard) Don't get me started on how I woke up with these clothes on.
- (The Crocker Cave)
- Crocker: Nice job poofing up the dirt on the floor and and mail woman outfit, Sparky.
- Foop: Yeah, I'll admit, I had my doubts of you, but in a way, you had it in you.
- Sparky: Yeah. Sometimes, I'm not sure who is more evil: me, or my anti-counterpart.
- Foop: (shivers) I think we both know the answer to that.
- Sparky: Still, I do feel bad for what I'm doing.
- Dark Laser: Just keep feeling bad. It makes it feel good in you. Just ask Flipsie.
- Flipsie: I may be a toy, but that's what makes me feel special. Arf, arf!
- Crocker: (to Foop) Good thing we have an actual dog on our side. (to Sparky) And I don't get why you feel guilty. Turner's the one who kicked you out of his life. You own nothing to him.
- Sparky: I suppose that's true.
- Dark Laser: And to make this weekend worth living, we'll let you do the honor of destroying Timmy.
- Sparky: Umm...
- (Crocker, Foop and Laser stare at Sparky while he's thinking of his decision)
- Sparky: I'll do it.
- Crocker: Now that's a good dog.
- Foop: Good at being bad.
- (Crocker, Foop and Laser laugh; Sparky makes an anxious look)
- (outside)
- Chloe: Okay, Timmy, if we want to be rid of Sparky, we need to think of something big.
- Neptunia: Big as my hair?
- Ivan: I prefer something like making something so bad, he'll have to leave town for good.
- Timantha: That's a great idea, Ivan.
- Timmy: And what's also a great idea is taking off those torn up mail woman clothes so he won't strike twice during your sleep.
- Timantha: Good point. I wish I had on my regular clothes.
- (Cosmo, Wanda and Poof poof up her regular clothes)
- Astronov: So, we're all in on this?
- Timmy: Totally, Sparky leaves out of our lives today.
- All: Yeah!
- (everyone sets up stuff around the neighborhood for Sparky)
- (The L.O.S.E.R.S. watch from a distance)
- Foop: Oh, please. Even that kind of bait won't stop an Anti-Fairy. Unless it's Chicken Corden Bleu, then I'd have to go there.
- Crocker: Here's your chance, dog. Go out there and show Turner who's the real master.
- (Sparky flies to Timmy and others)
- Sunny: Here he comes.
- Timmy: Everyone, get behind me. I'll deal with him.
- (everyone walks behind the bait)
- Sparky: Nice to see you again, Timmy.
- Timmy: Somehow, I like you better housebroken.
- Sparky: And I'd like to see your hat on top of smoldering ash (pulls up a charging laser) which will soon be your body.
- Timmy: Come on, Sparky. It's me, remember?
- (Sparky blasts his laser but wasn't pointed to Timmy)
- Timmy: (panicked) Okay, I can see that was a warning shot.
- Ivan: We can't just stand around. We have to help him.
- (the fairies pop out of hiding and raise their wands; Sparky blast the wands out of the fairies hands and catches them)
- Sparky: One wrong move and Timmy's beaver toast!
- Timmy: (walks backwards) Sparky, please. You don't want to do this! (slips and falls)
- Sparky: (charges his blaster) Oh, I think I do.
- Timmy: No, you don't! You're letting what the others say get to you. Look, I'm sorry for kicking you out of the house. I should've known better. I mean, you are a dog. Dogs pull up mischief all the time.
- (the charging on the blaster grows larger)
- Timmy: If you destroy me now, there will be regrets. I take back all the bad stuff I say about you. It doesn't matter. You were loyal. You were kind and to top it off, you are my dog, Sparky. (close his eyes) I love you!
- (Sparky's eyes widely open as Timmy's echo "love you" is still going until flashbacks appear)
- Timmy: This is your new home, Sparky.
- Timmy and Sparky: Shazee!
- (Sparky licks Timmy)
- Sparky: I'm gonna face my fear by showing that vacuum cleaner who's boss!
- Timmy: Those other Timmy's are me, and they love the same things as I love, and I love Sparky.
- Timmy: Ha! You missed me! But I got you... on camera. Sparky filmed the whole thing!
- Sparky: In HD. I mean, Woof. Bark. Dog sounds dogs make.
- Timmy: Thanks Sparky, you make everyone happy. You're the best dog ever.
- (Mr. and Mrs. Turner hug along)
- (flashbacks over)
- Sparky: I can't do it.
- Foop: Fool! What do you think you're doing?
- Sparky: Coming to my senses for the first time of my life!
- (poof up a giant three headed hydra)
- Cosmo: Snowball!
- (the hydra roars)
- Sparky: I'm calling it quits. Sic em.
- Dark Laser: I'm afraid he isn't bluffing!
- Crocker: I say we run now.
- (the L.O.S.E.R.S. run away screaming as the hydra chases them)
- Timmy: Sparky, what's going on?
- Sparky: Seeing who I am is what's going on. You're right, Timmy. I am mischievous and just saddened to be a pet to anyone. I know there's a lot of people who don't like me and wish I would go away, and I think we got off on the wrong foot. I know I can come off a little proactive, and for that I'm sorry. But if everyone could find a place in their hearts for the fairy dog that nobody wanted, I know you can forgive me for what I did to you in the past.
- Wanda: Well, I'll be honest with you, you sure were a disaster when it came to being Timmy's new pet. But, in a good way most of the time. So, in a way, we forgive you.
- Sparky: Thanks, Wanda. That really means something to me.
- Cosmo: So, what are you going to do now? You're not on the bad side anymore, and Timmy's parents will never let you back.
- Sparky: I'll improvise. And you don't have to worry about me anymore. You are all home free.
- Timmy: So, I guess this is goodbye, huh?
- Sparky: I'll still be around. Just enjoying the views around town.
- Astronov: Well, Sparky, we all hope you'll find something worth living.
- Ivan: Before you go, I want you to have this.
- Sparky: Oh, a non-ripping tennis ball! Thanks.
- Chloe: Sparky, even though I've known you for a short time and I'm more of a cat person...
- Neptunia: Who, me?
- Chloe: I just want to say to you that I knew there still was some good in you. If you're ever around when we need an ally, we'd love to have you.
- Sparky: Much obliged, Chloe. Well, I better get started with a new leaf. (flies away) Goodbye!
- (everyone waves goodbye)
- Timantha: He sure is a good dog.
- Timmy: He sure is, sis, he sure is.
- Wanda: I miss him already.
- Cosmo: I think he would make a great career. Like starring in a TV show playing the role of a talking fairy dog.
- Poof: That is if he doesn't receive a lot of negativity.
- (screen fades to black)
- (Crocker, Foop and Laser still being chased by the hydra)
- Crocker: Of all creatures, this one we're being chased after would not be something even I would like to keep as a pet!
- (Title Card ending)
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