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Experimental Love/Quotes

(Fairy World; Cupid's House)
Wallet: I'm so proud of you, Cupid. These experiments will be the perfect designs to keep Valentine's Day in perfect condition.
Cupid: Yeah, and when there's Valentine's Day, there is me. I don't have to remind you what happens if there is no love around Earth.
Wallet: I know, "No love equals no Valentines. No Valentines equals you slowly disappearing forever." I don't wanna be a widow. I'm terrible at computer dating.
Cupid: Well, that's never going to happen as long as our experiments stay in their place. I even gave them all names so they won't feel like they're being used as guinea pigs. (camera points to the love experiments while Cupid describes them) Here's Harv, the tough one so that whoever doesn't feel brave to stand up for him or herself and others, he'll change that in a jiffy. Snap, my favorite, will make people express their true feelings when it comes to TV shows and others opinion on one another. He'll have you spill the beans of your feelings in a "snap". Get it?
Wallet: (sarcastically) Oh, yeah. Pretty intriguing if you ask me.
Cupid: Even I know that was sarcasm. Last, and (to Wallet) thank goodness the least, Steve.
Wallet: Steve? Really?
Cupid: I ran out of really good names. Anyway, you have to be careful with this one. He can spread anti-love with his tail making everyone go in a constant argument with one another. The only good thing about him is that his powers can make wresting channels good again. We must keep these experiments inside their cages at all times. Otherwise, this holiday will be a disaster.
Wallet: Well, tomorrow is Valentine's Day, so we need to be prepared.
Cupid: Indeed we will. (turns off the lights) Lights out, experiments. (closes the door)
(The third experiment was still awake and used his flexible arm to reach for the key and unlocked himself free; he flew to Earth chuckling)

(Dimmsdale Junior High)
(Every kid walking and holding hands with their loved ones as Timmy, Ivan, Chloe and Timantha with their fairies watch while sitting on a bench)
Cosmo: Ah, Valentine's Day, another miraculous holiday where I try my best to be good at things I'm usually too wreckless to do.
Ivan: It only gets better during the late night dance at school.
Chloe: This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever!
Timantha: You said it!
Timmy: Yeah, no enemies, no wishes that have backfired on us, nothing could possibly go wrong!
(Steve the anti-love experiment hops past them)
Wanda: What was that?
Neptunia: Looked like something that can make wresting channels good again.
(scene cuts to Chester and Veronica)
Chester: As you can see, if you can see past the live flesh of a mere cat, it's actually a nutritious and fat-free part of any balanced breakfast.
Veronica: Really? Well, now that you mention it, it's actually...
(Steve's spread anti-love on Chester and Veronica; the two turned their eyebrows from into an angry scowl at each other)
Veronica: ...the most absolutely revolting thing anyone could ever taste! You are as pathetic in the 6th grade as you were in the fifth!
Chester: Oh, far be it from me to eat regular food. You'll never be as popular as Trixie and you'll never amount to nothing!
(Veronica frustratingly groans and kicks Chester in the shin and storm off)
Chester: Hey, come back here! (catches up) I'm not through with you yet!
Chloe: Not to sound street or anything, but what the holy heck just happened?
Astronov: It looks as though that... thing has made Chester and Veronica hate each other.
Sunny: (points) And it looks like they're not that thing's only target!
(camera points to A.J. and Charlotte; A.J. lying on a sheet attached to two trees looking at a book Charlotte is showing him)
A.J.: Oh, of course, 59.4 million seconds.
Charlotte: Yep, that's how many seconds there are in a year on Mars.
(Steve's spread anti-love on A.J. and Charlotte; the two turned their eyebrows from into an angry scowl at each other)
A.J.: And I sure wish it could take you at least twenty seconds to re-do that horrible swirly hair of yours!
Charlotte: You think so, Baldylocks? I can take half a second to trap you in those sheets!
A.J.: I like to see that.
Charlotte: Okay. (pulls up the sheets and spins A.J. until he was stuck on the sheets)
Poof: Something tells me that thing is making whoever loves each other, hate each other.
Cosmo: It's like an Ex-Valentine's Day deliverer!
(the anti-love experiment spray on Trixie and Remy; a lever pops up from the grass; Trixie pulls the lever and a boxing glove punch Remy off screen; Elmer and Rose get sprayed; Rose makes a pretend shocked look making Elmer turn around thinking that she saw something; Rose pulled the back of Elmer's pants and poured grass and dirt on him and pulled his pants over his head; Sally and Winston get sprayed; the two pull up fencing swords and fight each other)
Timmy: That weird thing is ruining Valentine's Day!
Ivan: We have to stop it!
(the fairies poof out of their disguises and help out to corner the experiment; it jumps up and spins around and spray them; Timmy and Chloe gasp and hold their breaths as the others were infected)
Timmy: Cosmo! Wanda! I wish that thing was gone!
Cosmo: Okay, we'll do that, (to Wanda) as soon as Naggie McNaggie Nag here does something about her interest of chocolate.
Wanda: Well, unlike you, chocolate has never made me cry, especially during our wedding anniversaries, which you forget every single year of our endless lives!
Timmy: Oh, no! A little help here, Poof?
Poof: Ask someone who can be only seen with one eye (to Sunny) while the other is covered in ugly hair.
Sunny: Why don't you grow some more yourself so I won't stare at the initial on the (pulls up her rattle) top of your head?
(too much hair grows on Poof's head; Poof loses his balance and fell off-screen)
Astronov: (to Neptunia) Go back to looking like you were in High School!
Neptunia: Go back to looking like you were never born!
Astronov: That makes no sense!
Neptunia: It doesn't have to, we're arguing!
Chloe: This is nuts! Now our godparents are infected too! Ivan, we got to do something!
Ivan: Something that'll make you screw things up at the end as usual? As if, Gappy!
Chloe: (gasp) Not you too!
Timmy: And I guess (to Timantha) you're infected as well, aren't you Timantha?
Timantha: Me? No. I'm as calm as a firm beating heart. Nah, just yanking you. (pulls up a picture of Sanjay and rips it in half and puts it in her mouth and tear it even more like a dog)
Timmy: That answers that question.
(noise and arguments was heard off-screen; Timmy and Chloe turn their heads as look as shown onscreen, everyone in Dimmsdale causing chaos due to the experiment)
Chloe: This is crazy! We need to figure out what that thing is and stop it!
Timmy: Looks like we're going to need think of a better advantage.
Chloe: Exactly what kind? We don't have magic on our side and not to mention we can't use it on true love.
Timmy: No, but there is one person's magic who can--
(scene cuts to Cupid's House)
Timmy: --not help us? What do you mean you cannot help us?!
Cupid: (looking weak) The love on Earth is draining like water in a sink! And it's all because of that AWOL experiment Steve running amok!
Chloe: That's what that thing is, an experiment?
Timmy: (chuckles) And you named it Steve?
Wallet: That's not important, but what is is that the experiment needs to be stopped or Cupid and Valentine's Day is gone forever!
Timmy: What can we do?
Chloe: I recommend the best thing for us to do is to convince the love ones how much they really care for each other. Maybe that could slowly make everyone come to there senses and things will be normal again.
Timmy: It's worth a try. We have no other options. Let's go!
(Timmy and Chloe take off)
Cupid: (to Wallet) Have you ever pegged those two as a couple?
Wallet: Hardly. Maybe in another lifetime or universe, but I highly doubt it.

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