Timmy: Since I've become nicer to Tootie, I made a promise to attend her birthday parties. Oh, and what about your birthdays, Ivan?
Astronov: Ivan's just as miserable as you. (flashback shows footage of Ivan's birthday party in Russia, with a birthday cake, a present, and no one else except him and his parents)
Xenia and Hadwin: С днем рождения! (Happy birthday!)
(past Ivan sighs; end flashback)
Ivan: At least I had the advantage of being an only child and having fairy godparents. (thinks) Wait, I got it!
Ivan: I have an idea. Tomorrow morning, I'm going to share my fairies with Tootie!
Chloe: But Ivan, you're already sharing them with me.
Ivan: I know. Plus, I'm aware that Vicky has been ruining Tootie's birthdays since her fourth birthday, but this time, it's gonna be different. Vicky will not ruin mine and Tootie's birthday, because she won't be invited!
(the next day; the Prestonovich's house)
Ivan: I wish you were mine and Tootie's fairy godparents for the rest of our birthday! To Vicky's house!
(Astronov, Neptunia and Sunny wave their wands; FAIRY LOAN! Ivan and his fairies teleport to Tootie's room, where she's still asleep.)
Ivan: Good morning, Tootie, and happy birthday.
Tootie:(wakes up) Good morning, thanks, and happy birthday to you too, Ivan.
Ivan: I have a little surprise for you. Guys?
Astronov, Neptunia and Sunny: Hi, Tootie! We're... ("Fairy Godparents" sign appears) your fairy godparents for the rest of your birthday! (The "parents" word falls and squishes Astronov)
Ivan: Consider this as a birthday gift from me. For the rest of the birthday, you get to share fairies with me.
Tootie: Wow! I wish I-
Ivan: Hold it, Tootie! Before you start wishing for things, you should read Da Rules first.
Sunny: Ivan's right. There are lots of rules here, with the most important one being you can never reveal the existence of your fairies, or we will go away forever.
Astronov: Besides, you don't want to repeat the same mistake like you almost did last year.
Neptunia: And I've heard that Cosmo and Wanda didn't bring up Da Rules to you when Timmy loaned them to you.
Astronov: That was a pretty stupid move.
Tootie: Oh...I see.
Sunny: But I've heard that it wasn't their fault, it was yours, because you were too excited and impatient.
Tootie: Well, I can assure you that it ain't gonna happen this time! Ever since my last birthday, I've grown wiser, stronger, less creepy and more patient.
Ivan: And if something happens to you when you're about to reveal your fairies, I'll try to restrain you.
Neptunia: You understand Da Rules now, Tootie? Because I didn't.
Ivan: Okay, let's do this. Say it with me Tootie, on the count of three. One, two, three!
Ivan and Tootie: We wish we could have a big birthday party! So big, that every person in Dimmsdale comes and brings us presents!
Ivan: Except for Vicky.
Astronov: Anything else?
Ivan: This party shall be celebrated at Mike E. Mozzarella's Pizza Fun House!
Astronov, Neptunia and Sunny: Done and done!
(Astronov, Neptunia and Sunny wave their wands; SENDING INVITATIONS!)
(a mailman arrives to Timmy's house with an oversized envelope)
Mailman #1: Ridiculously oversized novelty invitation for Timmy and Timantha Turner.
(The envelope unfolds, revealing cardboard cutouts of Tootie and Ivan, whose hands hold two free passes to Mike E. Mozzarella's for Ivan and Tootie's party. Timmy and Timantha take them)
Timmy: Two free passes to Mike E. Mozzarella's? Fantastic!
Timantha: Now, big brother, remember, those aren't just free passes to the restaurant, those are also invitations to Tootie and Ivan's birthday party.
Timmy: Yeah, of course.
(The Tang Mansion, a mailman arrives)
Mailman #2: Special delivery for Trixie Tang.
(Trixie opens up the envelope, revealing a free pass to Mike E. Mozzarella's for Ivan and Tootie's party)
Trixie: A free pass to Mike E. Mozzarella's and an invitation to Ivan and Tootie's birthday party? Well, that's an unexpected, but kind invitation. This is gonna be a blast! (leans against a lever; which then sets off a spring trap under the mailman; launching him into the air) Whoops. (walks away, whistling innocently)
(The Carmichael's home, a man dressed as the restaurant's mascot, Mike, rings the doorbell, Chloe answers the door)
Mike: This is a reminder about Tootie and Ivan's birthday party this Friday. Ready? And tell me that you don't have any crazy cats.
Chloe: I'm ready! And I don't have any cats.
(cue split-screen of various people recieving invitations to Ivan and Tootie's party and cheering)
John: Oh, Vicky!
Nicky: Me and John are going to Ivan and Tootie's birthday party at Mike E. Mozzarella's!
Vicky: Oooh, can I come?
John and Nicky: NO!!!
John: There's a reason why you don't deserve a free pass to your sister's birthday party. You've already tortured Tootie enough so many birthdays ago, and it's time for that to stop.
Nicky: That's why you're staying at home. If you come to Mike E. Mozzarella's and try to ruin your sister's birthday, you'll be grounded!
(John and Nicky shut the door, leaving Vicky alone in the house)
Vicky: I miss my parents being big cowards. But at least I have you, Doidle. (pets Doidle)
(Zack and Crocker pop out onscreen through a window)
Mr. Crocker: Hello, Vicky.
Vicky: Mr. Crocker? What are you doing here? And who's that guy?
Zack: I'm Zack Harrison, ex-government agent turned fairy hunter. I'm here to help Mr. Crocker reveal fairy godparents to the world.
Mr. Crocker: Is there something wrong?
Vicky: My parents left me at home and went to attend Tootie's birthday party without me.
Zack: Well, that sounds rather harsh.
Vicky: To be fair, though, I deserved it, after I tortured my sister so many times during her birthdays.
Mr. Crocker: And I've heard that today is that Russian kid Ivan's birthday aswell.
Zack: Hmm... I can take you to Ivan and Tootie's birthday party. I've heard that the party is at Mike E. Mozzarella's Pizza Fun House.
Vicky: You mean that same place where the pink-hatted twerp deliberately ignored my sister's birthday invitations and only used the free passes for the fun house?
Vicky: Wow, that means I get to ruin two birthdays for the price of one! Can Doidle come too? (Doidle barks)
Mr. Crocker: Sure.
Vicky: Alright! In your face, mom and dad!
(BIRTHDAY FIESTA!; Mike E. Mozzarella's Pizza Fun House)
Chet Ubetcha: Good afternoon, I'm Chet Ubetcha, and it's Party Central here at Mike E. Mozzarella's Pizza Fun House, as everyone is gearing up for the birthdays of Ivan Prestonovich and Tootie Miller!
(Tootie and Ivan enter the restaurant in fancy clothes, with Timmy and Chloe following them. Chloe twitches)
Ivan: What is it, Chloe?
Chloe: I'm not sure. I feel... a disturbance.
Ivan: If it's Crocker again, don't worry, I already told Tootie about Da Rules to never reveal her fairies.
Timmy: Good call, Ivan.
Ash: (heard) Excuse me, are you Timmy Turner?
Timmy: (turns his head around to see Ash) Yes, yes I am. Wait, do I know you?
Ash: Oh, I haven't introduced myself, I'm Ash Harrison and I have come to warn you about something.
Ivan: What is it?
Ash: My dad and Mr. Crocker are on their way to ruin Ivan and Tootie's birthday party!
Tootie: OH NO!!!
Chloe: Calm down, we can handle it.
Timmy: Harrison? You're the son of Zack Harrison and our school teacher, Erika Harrison?
Ash: Yes, yes I am. But don't worry, I'm on your side.
Timmy: How do you know that Crocker and Zack are planning to ruin Ivan and Tootie's birthday party? Are you even invited?
Ash: (holds the invitation) I have it in my hand. See? And I know that because my dad said he was going to get Mr. Crocker to do some important things.
Timmy: What important things?
Ash: Since dad mentioned Mr. Crocker, my guess is to reveal the existence of fairies in Tootie and Ivan's birthday party.
Chloe: So that explains the disturbance.
Timmy: How do you know about me and my fairy godparents?
Ash: Sally told me about you.
Timmy: That figures.
Ivan: Aren't you gonna help us, Ash?
Ash: I'm sorry, but you're on your own for now.
Timantha: If you're not going to help us, then where are you going?
Ash: I'm going to play in the Pellet Pit with Sally.
Ivan: Okay, have fun, Ash. (Francis approaches Ivan) Uh-oh...
(Tootie karate chops Francis on the shoulder, knocking him out cold)
Ivan: Thanks, Tootie.
Tootie: You're welcome. I thought there would be no enemies in our birthday party.
Ivan: Well, we did wish for every person in Dimmsdale to come and bring us presents.
Tootie: Good point.
Ivan: I wonder what present Francis has brought me? (digs into Francis' pocket, and finds deodorant spray) Alright, deodorant spray! (sprays his armpits) This is gonna come in handy during my dates with Chloe.
Tootie:(sniffs) And my dates with Timmy...
Ivan: Yeah. Sometimes, even enemies can bring great presents. (sees Brianna walking up to him) Oh, hi, Brianna!
Brianna: Hi, Ivan, it's your birthday, innit?
Ivan: Yes, and it's also my friend Tootie's birthday. We were born on the same day.
Brianna: Fascinating. (to Chloe) You won't mind if I kiss Ivan, Chloe?
Chloe: No, I won't. Go ahead, it's his birthday, he earned it.
(Brianna kisses Ivan on the cheek; Ivan blushes)
Brianna: Happy birthday, Ivan.
Ivan: Thanks, Brianna. (to Timmy) Well, Timmy, now we're even.
Timmy: Yeah, pretty much. (looks down) Hey, look. (picks up a birthday card) It's one of those cards where you can record your own message.
Ivan: Let me see. (grabs the card and opens it)
Betty: (voice) Hi, Ivan, it's Betty. Wanted to wish you and Tootie a happy birthday all the way from New Orleans. Speaking of "wish", be careful what you wish for on your special day. Who knows if one of your enemies get suspicious. Okay, bye and happy birthday!
(Ivan closes the card)
Timantha: Supportive words from Betty Star, as usual.
Chloe: She does make a good point though.
Timmy: Yeah, (walks off-screen along with the others) if one of our enemies was eavesdropping on the party, who knows what'll happen.
Crocker: (pops out from a window with Zack and Vicky) You're about to find out, Timmy Turner!