Doctor Turner/Quotes

(The Turner's House, Timmy's parents are leaving)
Mr. Turner: We're off to work, Vicky will babysit you, you know the rest.
Mrs. Turner: Bye, Timmy!
(Timmy's parents leave)
Wanda: Vicky will be here in 3, 2, 1...
(Vicky comes in, worried)
Vicky: Twerp, you gotta help me!
Timmy: Let me guess, it's another one of your tricks?
Vicky: No, I mean it! I need your help!
Timmy: Really? Help you in what?
Vicky: This! (points to Tootie, who looks pale and sick)
Tootie: Hi, Timmy... (sneezes)
Timmy: Oh my, Tootie, you don't look so good.
Vicky: Well, duh. I'm not gonna torture anyone who is feeling sick, or else I'll end up being infected. So I need you to take care of my sister until she feels better.
Timmy: Why not heal her yourself?
Vicky: I would, but... I'm not very good in providing medicine.
Timmy: Forget it, Vicky! I'm not doing it.
Vicky: In that case, I'll tell your parents that you infected her!
Timmy: Okay, okay, I'll do it!
Vicky: Well, you better get going, twerp. You have to cure her before your parents come back! I'll be watching you... (leaves to another room)
Timmy: Do I really have to do this?
Wanda: Yes. Don't be such a selfish boy!
Poof: You gotta do what you gotta do.
Timmy: I guess you're both right. (to Tootie) Don't worry, Tootie, I'll take care of you! (to Cosmo and Wanda) I wish I was the best doctor in the world!
(Cosmo and Wanda raise their wands, DOCTOR POOF! Timmy is in a doctor outfit. He salutes)
Timmy: Dr. Turner to the rescue! I, Dr. Turner, do solemnly swear by the Sacred Bedpan to fix the patient and ease her wretched suffering, even until all hope is gone!
Tootie: (coughs) You're my only hope, Timmy... (hugs Timmy and tries to kiss him)
Timmy: (shoves Tootie aside) Don't kiss me, I'm sterile! (pulls out a bottle of medicine) Okay, it's time to take your medicine. (pours medicine into a spoon) That should be the right dosage. Now, open your mouth.
Tootie: (opens her mouth) Aaaah.
Timmy: Make sure to swallop every drop, but I'm warning you, this medicine may taste very icky. (puts the spoon into Tootie's mouth; she struggles to swallow the medicine and soon swallows it)
Tootie: Yuck, that's very icky tasting medicine! Almost as icky as my sister!
Timmy: I warned you.
Tootie: But, since you're my dream doctor, Timmy, I'm willing to take any kind of medicine, as long as it cures me!
Timmy: (chuckles nervously) We'll see.

(montage of Timmy trying to cure Tootie in various ways, such as giving Tootie a massage, laying mustard plaster on Tootie's back and giving Tootie an injection while she looks at him; montage ends with Tootie in bed, looking slightly better. Timmy walks away)
Timmy: There, she'll be cured in no time.
Wanda: That's quite noble of you, Timmy.
Cosmo: Shhh, here comes Vicky!
(Cosmo, Wanda and Poof disguise themselves as goldfish; Vicky approaches Timmy)
Vicky: How's it going, twerp?
Timmy: She's almost cured.
Vicky: Oh, good... I seem to have caught the illness from her too!
(Vicky sneezes at Timmy; making him scream, fade to black; cut to Tootie in bed, waking up)
Tootie: Hmm... hey, I feel so much better! I feel like a million bucks! Thank you for curing me, Timmy! (Timmy doesn't respond) Timmy?
(camera pans over to Timmy in bed, looking pale and sick)
Tootie: Oh, no...
(Timmy's parents arrive)
Mr. Turner: We're home!
Mrs. Turner: Is Timmy okay?
Tootie: (coming downstairs with Timmy) No, I'm afraid. He's sick.
(Mr. Turner screams like a girl once he sees that his son is sick)
Mrs. Turner: How did this happen?
Timmy: Vicky infected me! (coughs)
Mr. Turner: (to Vicky) How dare you infect our son?! Begone, you kid-infecting babysitter! (pushes Vicky outside, closes the door) In that case, Tootie, you should babysit Timmy instead!
Tootie: Really? But I'm about the same age as him!
Mrs. Turner: We know. We would like for you to spend some quality time with our son. Here's the first aid kit! (hands Tootie a first aid kit)
Tootie: Hmm... (gets an idea) Don't worry, Timmy, I'll save you! Now it's my turn!
(Tootie dashes offscreen and returns dressed in a white nurse's hat and dress.)
Tootie: Nurse Tootie to the rescue!
Timmy: I wish it was Nurse Trixie instead...
(the fairies raise up their wands, but they make a raspberry noise)
Cosmo: Timmy, I'm afraid that Nurse Trixie's not available to miserable, unpopular boys.
Wanda: That, and it also interferes with true love.
Timmy: (turns to the audience with a worried expression and gulps nervously) If Tootie gives me a bubbly sponge bath, she better not let everyone see me! (sneezes)
(screen fades to black; ending title card)

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