Dental Catastrophe/Quotes
- (Timmy outside holding a ball; Ivan and fairies walk on-screen)
- Timmy: Hey Ivan, ready to play some Timmy Ball?
- Ivan: Not today, I have a dental appointment today. I'm heading to a dentist named Dr. Bender to check on my teeth.
- Timmy: Oh, okay. (opens his eyes wide open) What?! (catches up to Ivan) Ivan, I have to warn you right now that Dr. Bender is bad news. He's mean and really likes to get medieval on kids' mouths. He's no ordinary dentist.
- Ivan: I see. Well, as long as I have (to Astronov and Neptunia) you guys to protect me, I'll be fine.
- Astronov: You bet, Champ. Everything's gonna be... beh... ah-choo!
- (Ivan's head turns into a fly; Neptunia turns Ivan's head back to normal)
- Ivan: What just happened? Suddenly, I'm starting to have a craving for human blood.
- Timmy: Looks like Astronov has the fairy flu.
- Ivan: Fairy flu?
- Neptunia: It's a disease that allows fairies to temporarily lose control of their magic.
- Ivan: Then how am I gonna stay safe if you're gonna sneeze out something random?
- Timmy: Don't worry bud, my fairies and I will watch over you. You'll be fine.
- Ivan: Thanks Timmy.
- Wanda: In the meantime, you should probably go see Dr. Rip Studwell to get cured.
- Neptunia: Will do. (raise her wand) We'll be right back, Ivan. (poofs Astronov and herself away)
- Ivan: So, what kind of stuff does Dr. Bender have?
- Timmy: Lots of painful dental equipment that makes you want to cry for three weeks.
- Cosmo: I don't know what's worse, the dental equipment or having to wait in the waiting room quivering.
- Ivan: Is it really that horrible?
- Cosmo: Oh, it's even worse than that. They make you read scary looking magazines with pictures of kids screaming in pain after getting their teeth pulled out with the grip of a dirty hand.
- Ivan: Боже! (Goodness!)
- Wanda: Cosmo, stop scaring him.
- Cosmo: Hang on Wanda, I'm nearly done explaining. Then, the doctor pulls out his stethoscope, with an electrical shock of 50,000 volts.
- Ivan: No!
- Cosmo: Yes. A device to disastrous, one touch and you'll be... (making shocked noise and thuds on the ground)
- Ivan: (quivering) No! NO! (stops quivering) There's no way that's gonna happen. Scary or not, I'm gonna survive that mad man's madhouse one way or another! (short pause) So, how do I survive there?
- Timmy: Well, there is someone who is currently undercover who can help you. She'll be able to give you the information. Come on. I'll take you to her hideout before it's time for your appointment.
- Cosmo: Is this hideout a parking alley? Cause that would be pretty obvious.
- (Fairy World Hospital)
- (Astronov sneezed and poof up chocolate; Neptunia quickly poof up an umbrella to cover herself from the falling chocolate)
- Neptunia: That better not be Reindeer chocolate.
- (Dr. Rip Studwell floats out of the door)
- Studwell: Well, someone's looking good today.
- Astronov: Are you kidding me? I've just poofed up sweets that makes you want to spit it out on the other side of your body.
- Studwell: (camera zooms to a mirror) I was talking about me. Tell me the truth, are my teeth starting to rot?
- Neptunia: No, but that's not what we're here for. My husband has the fairy flu and we need a cure.
- Studwell: Don't worry, Dr. Rip Studwell is on the case. I'll get your cure and your fairy flu will be gone faster than you can say, "Be gone, Abominable Snowman!"
- Neptunia: Be gone, Abonila... ablunitab... abeanodib...
- Astronov: She could never pronounce the word right.
- Studwell: Better get that cure quickly before she hurts herself. (flies out)
- (Parking Alley)
- Cosmo: Her hideout is a parking alley. I knew it!
- Ivan: Is anyone here?
- (A shadow pops on-screen and the camera moves to the person)
- Girl: I've been expecting you.
- Ivan: Tootie?
- Poof: You may want to call her by her undercover persona, Deep Toot.
- (Ivan snickering)
- Ivan: Ehh, sorry.
- Wanda: Deep Toot, we need your help. Ivan needs to survive in Dr. Bender's if he's willing to get his teeth clean.
- Poof: We need intel in order to get inside.
- Deep Toot: There is one way. (pulls up the schematics)
- Ivan: Wow. That's a lot of rooms inside that place. Okay, there are traps everywhere. Alright, looks like I know how to get inside. Thanks. By the way, why are you even here?
- Tootie: (pulls up her fedora) Because, I have a dental appointment tomorrow, and I need to get away far as possible if I myself is willing to get prepared.
- Ivan: Good thinking.
- Timmy: Well, we better get going.
- (Timmy, Ivan and fairies walk out)
- Tootie: Good luck, guys.
- (Fairy World Hospital; Waiting Room)
- Astronov: Okay, it's been three hours. What is taken him so long? Ah-choo!
- (fish poofed inside Neptunia's mouth; Neptunia spits the fish out of her mouth)
- Neptunia: Yuck!
- Astronov: We better check up on him.
- (Astronov and Neptunia opens the door and sees Dr. Rip Studwell holding a golf club)
- Astronov: Studwell!
- Studwell: Oh, hey. I just wanted to tell you that the search for your cure is nearly done.
- Neptunia: Nearly done? Nearly DONE!!?
- Astronov: Now honey, calm down.
- Neptunia: I've been sitting in that waiting room for three hours avoiding the random objects being poof up uncontrollably while trying to pronounce abominable right, while you swing golf clubs!!
- Studwell: I was just done with my field goal.
- Neptunia: (snatches the golf club, with her face red) I'LL SHOW YOU A FIELD GOAL!!!
- (smashing noises off-screen with Astronov visibly seen with surprised looks seeing Neptunia hurting Dr. Studwell while smashing everything in the room until Astronov sneezed and a hammer appears and fell down opening a medicine cabinet; As Neptunia's still smashing stuff, the rumbling made what's inside the cabinet fell on Studwell's head; Neptunia calms down after the object fell down)
- Neptunia: Sauerkraut?
- Astronov: Of course. It's the only cure for the fairy flu. It might taste bad, but it's the only way.
- (picks it up and eats the sauerkraut as quickly as he could)
- Astronov: Ugh... ahh... Hey, I don't feel sick anymore. I'm cured!
- Studwell: Well done. Your temperature is good and you're free to go. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some uhh... more appointments to schedule. (poofs away)
- Astronov: That guy is not a good doctor.
- (Dr. Bender's house)
- Ivan: Well, here we are.
- Poof: Are you ready for this?
- Ivan: Ready as ever. Let's go.
- (Cosmo poofed Timmy, Wanda, and Poof as Ivan's shirt pocket pencils and himself as Ivan's backpack; Ivan walks inside the waiting room and opens the door seeing the traps along the way to Bender's room)
- Ivan: Okay, traps, give me your best shot.
- Cosmo: Don't say shot while in a hospital!
- (traps activate; Ivan dodges them)
- Timmy: On your left, Ivan.
- Wanda: Now your right.
- Poof: Look out for the giant toothbrush!
- (Ivan quickly outruns the giant toothbrush)
- Ivan: A giant toothbrush?! Seriously?
- (kicks the door and jumps on the seat)
- Ivan: Made it.
- Bender: (pops up) And just in time too.
- Ivan: So what, do I just sit here and think happy thoughts while I get this dental appointment done for?
- Bender: What's the word I'm looking for? It's in the tip of my tongue. Oh yeah, NO!!! You just sit there and quiver while my son and I slowly and painfully whiten those foul smelling teeth of yours. Wendell, is the "special equipment" ready?
- Wendell: Fully operational, pop.
- Bender: Now you just kindly sit there, WHILE WE GET MEDIEVAL ON YOUR MOUTH!
- (Bender and Wendell wickedly laugh while Ivan quivers)
- (sidewalk)
- Ivan: You know, despite the antagonizing pain I'll be feeling for weeks thanks to that Yank-o-ripto-matic, it wasn't half bad.
- Timmy: You were really brave there, Ivan. No other kid in town couldn't have made it out of there without crying for twenty minutes.
- (Astronov and Neptunia poofs up)
- Astronov: We're back.
- Ivan: How was it?
- Neptunia: We we're going to ask the same thing to you, but why don't the two of you say it at the same time to see which is the worst.
- Ivan: Okay, one, two, three.
- Ivan and Astronov: It was alright. (the two look at each other and laugh)
- Ivan: For your sake, I hope you've had a better time than me.
- Timmy: Don't worry Ivan, your friends will be there for you no matter what.
- Ivan: Yeah, the next time I get an appointment from that massive overbite of a dentist, I'll be ready for it.
- Neptunia: Ah-choo!
- (flowers poof in Poof's ears)
- Poof: Uh-oh. Looks like you've caught the fairy flu, Miss Neptunia.
- Astronov: Don't worry, I got this. (poof us sauerkraut) Bon appetite.
- (Neptunia's face turns green, holding her vomit)
- (screen fades to black; Dr. Rip Studwell swings a golf ball)
- Studwell: Fore! (looks front and center) Oh, uh... just taking a break from my daily shift.
- (Title Card ending)
Previous Episode's Quotes /// Dental Catastrophe's Quotes \\\ Next Episode's Quotes