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Catman and Ivan/Quotes

(The Turner's garage; Timmy and Ivan look through stuff all over the garage)
Timmy: Thanks for helping me out with my garage, Ivan. I don't know what to do with all of this (zoom out showing the full garage) junk lying around.
Ivan: It's simple Timmy: (cool looking stuff shown) If it's cool, keep it, (lame looking stuff shown) and if it's lame, throw it away.
(Timmy digs threw his stuff until his picks up a voodoo doll looking like Vicky)
Timmy: Hey, my old voodoo doll of Vicky I wished for! Sadly, it doesn't do a thing so... throwing away.
(Timmy throws the voodoo Vicky doll into the trash bin; scene cuts to Vicky's house as Vicky was in her garage sharpening her axe until magic sparkles appear around her and she was hurled into the trash bin, revealing that the voodoo doll does work)
Vicky: (shouts off-screen while inside the trash bin) TWEEERRP!!
(back to Timmy's garage; Ivan's smartphone beeps, Ivan picks up his phone out of his pocket looking at it)
Ivan: Gotta go! I'm off on a date with Veronica. And do you know what's going to be the best part of this date?
Cosmo: Have a nice romantic private dinner in an alley eating spaghetti together until... (points at his mouth) you know.
Ivan: No, I'm going to meet her dad!
Astronov: That's wonderful, champ! A step to the next level!
Neptunia: I'm proud of you Ivan! Let's just hope your second date goes better than Astronov and mines. (to Astronov) You remember, right, sweetie?
Astronov: How could I forget? You convinced me to disguise ourselves as mules to take a long walk at the Mexican desert, some kid found us and wrapped us up on a tree for his birthday party, and he and his friends had one too much cake and started beating us with sticks shouting, "Piñata! Piñata!"
Neptunia: (pulls out a picture of her and Astronov as mules getting beaten by kids mistaken them for piñatas) In retrospect, I should've thought twice about making us look like paper maché.
(Timmy and Ivan stare at each other speechless)

(The Star's House; Ivan walk to the front door and take a big deep breath holding his gut up and smiles; he rings the door bell and Veronica opens it the door)
Veronica: Ivan, there's no need to look too manly for my dad.
Ivan: Sorry, Veronica. You know how I like to make a first good impression.
Veronica: Well, daddy's in his storage closet downstairs.
(Ivan still holding up his gut and smiling makes his way to the closet; he walks past Katty)
Katty: Meow.
Ivan: Hi, Katty.
(Ivan opens the door to the closet; camera pans open showing how long the stairs are)
Ivan: Man, this has to be the deepest downstairs I've ever seen inside a house. I must be near the Earth's core by now.
(Ivan makes it to the closet downstairs and gasps hard, letting lose his held gut; camera slowly revealing Catman's Cat Cave)
Ivan: (looking around) Ничего себе! (No way!) I've died and gone to Geek Heaven! Look at all this Catman related stuff! (camera shows what Ivan's shouting out) Cat-A-Rangs, Cat Claws, Cat Lasers, Cat Litter (super-absorbent). Veronica's dad must be a true Catman fan! This place looks almost like the Cat Cave I've heard so much about.
Voice: Correction: (camera points to the shadowy figure) This is... (revealing Catman) the Cat Cave.
Ivan: I can't believe it! It's you! T.V.'s Adam West!
Man: Pleased to meet you, kid, but I'm not T.V.'s Adam West. That guy is up in the heavens now.
Ivan: He's... gone? I really need to watch the news more often. So, who are you?
Man: (takes off the mask revealing himself) The father of the girl you're dating, Matthew Star.
Ivan: Mr. Star, it's such an honor to meet you. I have so many questions. How did you find Catman's Cat Cave?
Matt: Actually, he gave it to me. You see, a while back when he was still alive I paid him a visit in the Retirement Home of Justice (echo) Justice... Justice...
(flashback to the "It's A Wrap" Retirement Community)
Matt: I've always been his #1 fan, and he was my #1 fan for believing in him. He told me he was getting older and had no other choice but to hand over the keys to someone worthy of his talents. And it was me.
(Adam hands over his keys to the Cat Cave to Matt as he smiles in tears)
Matt: (standing in front of Adam West's monument) A few weeks later, Adam West was Catman no more. At least that's what the media said, but I didn't believe that.
(flashback over)
Matt: Later on, after the funeral, they turned Adam's old home, Stately Wast Manor, into a museum dedicated to him.
Ivan: Wow. So, how does it feel to be the new Catman?
Matt: Oh, following the steps of the man I used to idolize when I was your age is both an honor and a privilege! Right now, I've got a call from Hollywood into volunteering to star as Catman and in an upcoming reboot, "Catman: The Movie". Don't worry, (pulls out the script) the writing of this movie is better than it sounds.
Ivan: (reads the script) Wow, this is really good. I mean, it's not the original but still as good.
Matt: Only problem is, I can't go without casting new kid sidekicks to play the perfect role of (pulls out costumes) Raven the Boy Wonder and Nuts.
Ivan: I think I can make that arrange to my advantage.

(Hollywood; Matt, Veronica and Katty walk out of the taxi with Ivan dressed as Raven the Boy Wonder and Timmy dressed as Nuts)
Timmy: I gotta admit, I never thought I'd wear this again.
Veronica: Come on, Timmy, you look amazing in that outfit. Even if some people find it ridiculously funny (pulls up her phone showing the last time Timmy wore the Nuts outfit) and made it viral.
(Timmy makes a deadpan look)
Matt: Here it is, (camera points the location) the auditions for the new Catman movie. Let's head inside (begins to walk) and quickly too because the smell of that Clutchulacks spray from the Crash Nebula Section is killing me.

(inside the auditions; the director walk to Matt)
Director: Nice of you to join us, Mr. Star. Hope you aren't too nervous.
Matt: Nonsense, I'm prepared for anything.
Director: Good, and with you looking exactly like our late T.V. actor, we have nothing to worry about.
Matt: Wish me luck kids! (takes off) I've got a man to honor!
(Matt takes the stage; spotlights turned on bright; Matt's eyes turned wide open)
Cameraman #1: Camera's in position!
Cameraman #2: Coming on in 3... 2... 1!
Director: And... action!
(Matt starts to look sweaty and anxiously stands in place while the other actors do their roles, having one male actor play the role of the villain, the Quizzler, while two female actors play the hostages)
Female Actor #1: You won't get away with this, Quizzler!
Female Actor #2: Yeah, Catman and his sidekicks will show up to the rescue and pass your little quiz!
Male Actor: (evil laugh) No one can defeat a mind such as mine!
(Matt still standing in place)
Male Actor: I said, no one can defeat a mind such as mine!
(Matt still standing in place)
Wanda: What's wrong with Mr. Star?
Poof: Looks like he has stage fright.
Director: CUT!! Take five!
(stage spotlights turned down and everyone on stage but Matt walked out)
Director: Mr. Star, what were you doing out there?! What the heck kind of acting is that?
Matt: Sorry, Mr. Director, sir, I completely chocked.
Director: Well, you better do something about it or this movie is ruined. (walk out) Catman looking shy on stage. Some #1 fan you were to Adam West.
Matt: (looking down depressed) Oh...
Veronica: Don't give up, daddy.
Ivan: Yeah, don't let what that director just said get to you. You still got another chance out there.
Matt: No. He's right. All I am was just Adam's #1 fan and nothing more. (takes the mask off) I'm no Catman. (walk out)
(Timmy makes a firm look and quickly catches up to Veronica's dad)
Timmy: Hold it! You are Catman! And you can be just as good a Catman as Adam was!
Ivan: Timmy...
Timmy: And sure Adam was a bit wacky and delirious after his own show got cancelled decades ago, but he never gave up. Heck, I was his lawyer/doctor helping him get out of trouble from time to time.
Matt: How exactly did you possibly achieve a degree of being a lawyer and doctor?
Timmy: Uhh... internet? The point is, you can be the new Catman. You've inherited everything the old Catman owned, you got the costume down, and your heroic sounding voice is just what the camera's need to hear. And if that's not honoring Adam's legacy, I don't know what is.
(Ivan, Veronica and the disguised fairies smiled after Timmy motivated Matt)
Matt: You're right Timmy! I can do this! I am the new Catman!
Timmy: Correction: (puts his Nuts costume on) "You're right Nuts!" Now come on, you got a movie to make!
(Matt puts the Catman mask on and bravely walks back to stage)

(Matt standing on stage)
Matt: (to himself) You can do this. This is for Adam West.
Cameraman #2: Camera's in position!
Director: And... action!
(scene turns into widescreen theater mode)
(female hostages scream in terror)
Quizzler: (evil laugh) Nothing can stop a genius like me!
Catman: (voice) You might as well re-take a test, Quizzler...
Quizzler: Huh?
(camera pans from above revealing Catman, Raven and Nuts standing in place on top of a building)
Catman: ...because your "brilliant mind" is just as delirious as your over-inflated ego!
Quizzler: Ah, Catman and his sidekicks, Raven the Boy Blunder and Nut-bag.
Nuts: That's Nuts to you, you question marking floozy!
Quizzler: Well then, I have a question for you all. (pulls out a board showing his quiz) Three of you fused bodies makes half a circle, and at the end of Raven's left wing makes a straight line in the middle of the half circle, what is the thing?
Raven: Shivering feathers, that sounds hard! (to Catman) Catman, you got to know the answer or the Quizzler's hostages are goners!
Catman: It's simple, young ward: The answer is the letter G! (pulls up a fist)
(POW)
(Quizzler falls face first on the ground)
Quizzler: Gee, I did not see that coming.
(Nuts spit out dozens of nuts from his mouth scaring away the sharks out of the tank and making a safe landing spot; Raven flies up and free Quizzler's hostages)
Female #1: Thanks for all your help, heroes!
Female #2: We wouldn't have a safe city without crime crusaders like you.
Catman: A hero's work is never done.
Director: Cut! Print!
(widescreen turns to normal as everyone walks off stage; everyone congratulated Matt on his success)

Director: Congratulations, Mr. Star! You really are worthy to be the new Catman! Say, how would you like your name on Hollywood Stars on the streets? Your new fans can see what a "cat-tastic" Catman you were!
Matt: I appreciated that, sir, but I prefer to let that legendary name stay there for future generations to come. Adam West was and will always be the one and only Catman.
Director: Well, I respect your choice, Mr. Star. You got modesty. But, if you're ever in the mood to portray Catman again in the Crimson Chin vs Catman movie, just give us a call anytime.

(The Star's House)
Ivan: Well, your father is now a superstar and Adam West's legacy as Catman is in the proper hands.
Veronica: Yeah, and if you and Timmy didn't motivate my daddy into being what he dreamed of being, none of this would have happened. And for making my dad happy, you deserve a reward. (pucker her lips)
(Ivan puckers up too they nearly kiss until...)
Veronica: (Neptunia's voice) Psyche!
Ivan: Wha...
Neptunia: (disguised as Veronica) The real Veronica is over there.
(Veronica with Timmy and his fairies and Astronov wave hello)
Ivan: Neptunia?!
Neptunia: (turns to normal) Gotcha, scamp!
(everyone laughs)
Ivan: Okay, alright now.
(camera pans up until it reaches Heaven where Adam West is standing up top and winks at the screen with a smile)
(video footage of Adam West)
(action poses introducing Catman, pulls out a "call me" sign voting for Timmy's dad and mistaken him for a she), (having his name being said by his fans, getting his popcorn before grappling up again), (Timmy wishing Catman to not be guilty, battling the Crimson Chin and winning, handshake the Chin after defeating Dog-zilla), (playing crochet with Timmy, turned into a kid, Catman in an arcade video game defeating his foe, realizing he is Catman, defeating Shallowgrave), (standing up a rooftop during a full moon, gets healed by Timmy's fairies, giving a cheer to the football field, attacking the Blue Bird mascot, attacking the Wheel of Cheese contestants dressed as mice, defeating the rats from the Turner's house), (narrating on how a kid will lose their fairies), (getting his present wrapped around his arms, mistaking Sparky for Dogman, sleeping in his box, preparing a fight against Dogman, having his body turned buff due to Timmy's wish to defeat Dogman, lifting up Dogman's pit bull dozer and destroys it, use his super sonic purr to defeat Dogman, apologizing to Sparky mistaking him for Dogman, asking Timmy to pay for his food), (flushed in the toilet by a nurse thinking he's dead, wearing Mr. Turner's rat costume and come up with Ratman, getting devoured alive by Cuddles, taming Cuddles and attacking a giant squid saving Timmy and his fairies), (Timmy watching a Catman marathon), (Catman inviting Timmy for his 50th anniversary gala event, trying to catch a red dot, meeting Chloe and mistaking her for Catgirl, driving his cart, observing Cosmo's whittling, confronting Cosmo thinking he's the Whittler, getting blown away after Crocker's fairy sucker blow up, wishing he and Chloe could crime fight every day), (mushing his face on Timmy's bedroom window, hugging Timmy in depression, crashing onto Timmy's room, get scared of Timmy and Chloe dressed as their last years Halloween costumes, lick Cosmo's wand and turned into the real Catman on T.V., Mouseman comes to life and confronts Catman, Catman driving at full speed to catch up to Mouseman, Catman confronts and defeats Mouseman and free Timmy, Wonder Gal and Don, Catman beats up Don after he flirts with Wonder Gal, Catman turned normal and walks out with Wonder Gal), (pop up from the back of the Turner's couch and volunteer to be in a movie, giving Timmy his new alter-ego, Nuts, shopping while Dad video shoot for his movie, Catman hisses at a dog until the dog growls and scares him off and chases him, Catman with Timmy on top of Dinkleberg's destroyed house sees Mr. Turner firing Chloe), (telling Timmy that Wonder Gal is with Don, win Wonder Gal's heart by beating up Don), (Catman in Kitty Heaven pop out of a pile of yarn and take off)
(In Loving Memory of William West Anderson, "Adam West")

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