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Blast from the... Past?/Quotes

(Turner's House)
(Timmy and his fairies watching TV)
(Ivan, Chloe and their fairies walked through Timmy's door)
Ivan: Hey guys.
Timmy and Poof: (in unison) Hey.
Cosmo: (in unison) What's up?
Wanda: (in unison) Hello.
Ivan: I wanted to get this thought out of my mind and... think you can show me the time you've got your fairies?
Timmy: I'd be glad to. I was planning on time traveling next week, but now's a good time as any. (walks to his closet and opens it, pulling out his time scooter)
Ivan: Sweet, we get to use your time scooter again.
Chloe: Cool. Might as well make some upgrades for my bike when we get back.
Timmy: (jumps on his scooter) Hop on guys.
(Ivan and Chloe hop on to the sided seats)
Wanda: Batteries to power...
Cosmo: Oh! Wait. I wanna say it this time, Wanda.
Wanda: Oh, go ahead.
Cosmo: Batteries to power...
(Timmy presses the power button)
Cosmo: Turbines to speed...
(Ivan and Chloe pulls the lever)
Cosmo: And... kick it homies!
Timmy: Say it right.
Cosmo: Blast off.
(Kids and fairies fly through the time warphole)

(The Past)
Wanda: Well, here we are.
(camera shows Timmy's house)
Timmy: That's weird. It looks like my house, but... different.
(everyone walks near a window and see the past Turners and Vicky talking)
Past Dad: Thanks for babysitting tonight, Vicky. Timmy just loves making new friends, don't you Timmy?
Past Vicky: No problem, Mr. Turner! I just love Timmy. We're gonna be best pals! (grabs Timmy) Right, Timmy?
Past Timmy: Oxygen... darkness!
Past Vicky: Have fun at the movies! Bye! (her loving smile changes to a nasty-looking scowl as she shuts the door) All right, squirt, three things: 1) Stay out of my way. 2) Go to bed early. 3) Do the dishes.
Past Timmy: Mom told you to do 'em!
Past Vicky: Oh yeah... well, you wouldn't want her to find this magazine, would you? (holds up a magazine titled "Chix")
Past Timmy: That's not mine! Mom will never believe you.
Sunny: Not to sound offensive, but what is up with your voice, Timmy?
Neptunia: Yeah, you sound like someone who's about to give up a huge opportunity.
Timmy: That's probably nothing.
Chloe: And you should've heard Vicky's voice.
Ivan: She sure sounded a lot less violent than she is now.
Timmy: It was the violence in the Dungeon Channel that made her act more aggressive.
Past Vicky: (chuckles) Oh, I wouldn't say that; it works great at my house! Just ask my little brother! (dials on the phone)
(to present Timmy and the others as the past Vicky's brother is heard screaming)
Chloe: Brother? I don't remember Vicky having a brother. Unless...
Neptunia: Vicky's brother is actually Tootie.
Timmy: WHAT?! (imagines Tootie as a boy with short hair, wearing Tootie's clothes, holding makeup and a pigtails wig) So my girlfriend that stalked me was actually a boy this entire time? (screams in disgust)
Ivan: Quiet! (to Neptunia) Stop traumatizing Timmy!
Neptunia: I didn't mean it that way!
Ivan: This is not a good time for joking. If I had to guess, Vicky lied about having a brother.
Astronov: I better check her house. (poofs up X-ray binoculars, looks through Vicky's house and sees past Tootie) Ivan, you're right, Vicky did lie about having a brother.

Cosmo: Oh, here comes your past self. Boy you sure looked exhausted.
Past Timmy: Hey, you ate all the pizza!
Past Vicky: Relax, runt. I saved you a piece. (holds up one with anchovies)
(to present Timmy and the others as the past Timmy screams off-screen)
Ivan: Ehh! I've never liked anchovies either. Makes me throw up every time I take a bite out of it.
Astronov: Looks like Vicky's dragging you to your room.
Timmy: Might want to take a look.
(fairies turn their godchildren and themselves into birds, and fly up to Timmy's bedroom window and see the past Timmy lying on his bed with a frozen face.)
Wanda: Still thinking of those anchovies, I see?
Timmy: Three, two, one.
(Past Vicky drenches a bucket of water on Past Timmy)
Past Vicky: Good, you're awake. Wouldn't want you to miss your bedtime!
Past Timmy: But I'm not tired!
Past Vicky: Oh, we could watch your favorite television show, The World of Lip Gloss! It's on the Makeup Channel.
Past Timmy: That's your favorite show!
Past Vicky: Oh, so it is! (laughs evilly and leaves the room)
Past Timmy: Very funny! (slams door and gets out his Magic 9-Ball) Oh Magic 9-Ball, when will my parents get back from the movies? (reading answer) Titanic: Director's Cut?! They'll be there all night! Man, that's dumb!
(throws his Magic 9-Ball to the wall)
Timmy: And here comes the moment that changed everything.
(A magic aura forms from the ball, then swirls into thin air, bringing forth the entrance of Cosmo and Wanda)
Past Cosmo and Wanda: HEY TIMMY!
Past Cosmo: I'm Cosmo!
Past Wanda: I'm Wanda!
Both: And we're... YOUR FAIRY GODPARENTS!
Past Wanda: What do you think, Timmy?
Past Timmy: I think I'm calling the cops.
Past Wanda: Hold it, tiger! (poofs up a stopping line) You can't tell anyone about us.
Past Cosmo: If you do, we'll just go away forever.
Past Timmy: Why?
Past Wanda: Well, that's what the rulebook says. (poofs up Da Rules and it lands on Timmy) Oops, sorry.
Past Cosmo: There's lots of rules, Timmy.
Past Timmy: Why are you here?
Past Cosmo: We want to help you! We're magic! Ooh! Magic! Ooh!
Past Wanda: We grant wishes! (chuckles)
Chloe: Wow! Cosmo. You and your voice sounded pretty... intelligent.
Cosmo: I wonder what went wrong.
Poof: Oh, shh. It's Vicky.
Past Vicky: What's with the fish?
Past Timmy: Uh, those are my godfish-- goldfish!
Past Vicky: Fish are riddled with germs. I wouldn't want you getting sick. Maybe I should flush 'em!
Past Timmy: No!
Past Cosmo: Should we do something?
Past Wanda: Well, he's got to wish for it first!
Past Cosmo: Ooh, I hate that rule.
Past Wanda: I'm calling a union meeting.
Past Vicky: I want these disgusting creatures out of here or it's toilet time for the two of them! (exits)
Wanda: And here comes the sarcasm.
Past Wanda: [sarcastically] Sweet girl.
Past Cosmo: I love her fangs.
Cosmo: (laughs) I'll never forget the day I said that.
Astronov: Quiet! They'll hear you.
Wanda: Here cones your very first wish, Sport.
Past Timmy: Then I wish for one thing -
Both Timmys: (split-screen) Gelatin.
(Quick cut to Vicky relaxing in the bathtub. The water turns into gelatin, much to her horror)
Past Cosmo: You always were great with dessert! (he and Wanda giggle)
Past Timmy: Whipped cream! (the shower head squirts it on Vicky) Cherry! (a giant one lands on Vicky as she tries to sneak out of the tub)
Sunny: Uh, anyone else notice her lipstick dissapeared?
Past Timmy: That's great! Can you make her into a giant chocolate shake?
Past Cosmo: Oooh, may I, Pookie?
Past Wanda: Of course, Stallion.
(Cosmo turns Vicky into a giant snake)
Past Timmy: Aaaaahhhhh!
Past Wanda: He said "chocolate shake, not "chocolate snake!"
Past Cosmo: (Looking at his wand) I gotta get this thing fixed!
Ivan: Still had a messed up wand, huh?
(Past Snake Vicky chases past Timmy)
Past Wanda: Timmy, wish for something!
Past Timmy: I wish she was a fly! (Past C&W turn her into one and give Timmy a flyswatter) Thank you.
Past Vicky: Aaaaahhhhh! (flies away and backs onto the freezer door)
Past Timmy: Frostbite!
(C&W come out of the freezer as polar bears and scare Vicky)
Past Cosmo: Anything else, Timmy?
Past Timmy: Here's a wish list.
Past C&W: Ooooooh.
Past Vicky: (now back to normal) You can't do this to me! I'm the babysitter!
Past Wanda: (sits on Vicky, as a giant baby) Goo goo!
Past Cosmo: (as Groucho Marx) That's the first time the baby ever sat on the sitter!
Past Vicky: Help!
Past Cosmo: Sorry! The secret word was pie! (throws a pie in Vicky's face)
(Vicky screams and runs off, then stops and sees she's in a belly of a whale, actually a transformed Cosmo. She screams again and jumps out of him)
Past Cosmo: Sorry, is it my breath?
(Past Vicky swims for her life and is suddenly turned into an astronaut. Cosmo and Wanda come zapping her in colored spaceships)
Past Vicky: Yikes!
Past Wanda: (wearing a Darth Vader costume) The force is strong with this one!
Past Cosmo: (wearing the same) I am your father! I always wanted to say that.
Cosmo: Don't you just love parodies?
(Past Vicky jumps into a crater to avoid their fire. When she climbs out, it has turned into a circus cannon that fires her, tied up, onto some train tracks)
Past Timmy: (dressed like Snidely Whiplash) Well Vicky, any last words?
Past Cosmo: (as the train) Woo woo, baby, woo woo!
Past Timmy: Well?
Past Vicky: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Stop, I'll do anything! (scene fades as if it were a dream) Anything!
Past Dad: Vicky? Vicky? Looks like you were having a bad dream. Maybe too much pizza?
Past Mom: Why don't we drive you home now?
Past Vicky: Uh, sure.
Past Timmy: Oh, Vicky, remember you promised to hand-wash all my laundry? After all, mom, she did such a great job on the dishes.
Past Mom: Of course, dear.
Past Vicky: LAUNDRY?! Why you little, uh-- (notices C&W in fishbowl) Laundry! Sure, I'll do your laundry! I don't know what's going on around here, but I'm gonna find out.
Past Timmy: See ya, Vicky! Hey mom, Vicky's the best friend ever! Can she babysit all the time?
Past Mom: Of course, dear.
Past Cosmo:' Looks like we'll be here a while!
Past Wanda: Well, at least we'll be clean! (they giggle and swim inside their castle)
Wanda: Is that what we use to do back then, making cheesy puns?
Cosmo: Yeah, but in a way, it did felt entertaining.
Ivan: Wow Timmy, you sure had a pretty lucky day.
Timmy: I sure did, and in a strange way, I should thank Vicky. If it we're for her, (to Cosmo and Wanda) I never would've met you guys.
Cosmo and Wanda: (hugs Timmy) Oh, Timmy.
Wanda: You ready to go back?
Timmy: You bet.
(Timmy, Ivan and Chloe jump on the time scooter)
Chloe: It's weird that when we came to this time, we didn't change into what you've looked like back then.
Timmy: Yeah, it is weird.
(everyone jumps to the time portal)

(Turner's House;Present Day)
Dad: (off-screen) Oh, Timmy!
(fairies quickly disguise themselves)
Dad: (on-screen, he and Mom wear their old clothes) What do you think of your mother and I's new uniform?
Timmy: Dad, you guys haven't worn those clothes in a long time.
Mom: Really? Must have slipped our minds.
Dad: Well, we better get going to the movies. See yah.
Timmy: It's hard to believe my parents were less goofy back then.
Cosmo: (old voice) You're telling me.
Wanda: Cosmo, your voice.
Cosmo: You like?
Wanda: Ooh, yeah, but I love you no matter what voice you have.
Cosmo: (normal voice) Okay.
Astronov: Well, this sure was a nice time to time traveling travel.
Neptunia: See you guys.
Poof: There are some things you can never change.
(Ivan, Chloe and their fairies poof away)
(screen fades to black; Cosmo and Wanda pop up)
Cosmo: (old voice) We're magic. Ooh. Magic. Ooh.
Wanda: (laughs)
(Title Card ending)

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