An Unusual School Day/Quotes

(Sally and Mary come out of the school bus and arrive at Lyra Ubetcha Memorial School. Meanwhile, a car approaches, with Ash coming out of it)
Erika: Okay, Ash, have fun at school.
Ash: Don't worry, mom. I will.
Erika: I must warn you, though: there are a few unfriendly faces here at school. If you find some friends, just let me know. Be careful.
Ash: I know how to take care of myself, mom. Bye!
Erika: Good luck! (drives away)
(Ash walks over to Sally, Mary and Winston, with two other kids approaching them, one kid carrying a saxophone and the other with a comic book)
Ash: Hi, what's your name? I'm Ash.
Sally: My name's Sally, nice to meet you.
Mary: And I'm her younger sister, Mary. I'm in the 2nd grade.
Bryan: Hey, guys. Name's Bryan Parker.
Lawrence: I'm Lawrence Trevor, and I'm very good on the saxophone. (plays a song on his saxophone)
Mary: Hey, that was pretty good!
Lawrence: Thank you. My dad kinda dislikes me playing the saxophone.
Winston: I'm Winston.
Sally: He's my boyfriend. It's so pleasing to meet new kids in school.
Mary: You can say that again.
Bryan: Shh, here comes Robert Doyle, the meanest kid in school!
(Robert Doyle walks up to the kids; snatches a constructed toy car with a man inside from a kid and drops it on the pavement, smashing it into pieces)
Kid: Hey! Do you know how expensive those Locko toys are? It's gonna take me all day to put it all back together!
Robert: Well, well, looks like I'll have some extra lunch money today!
Ash: In your dreams. (pulls out pepper spray and sprays Robert, making him scream and run away; Mary picks up the pieces of the Locko toy and puts it back together)
Sally: Wow, Ash, you took care of Robert by yourself?
Ash: Yes, and it's all thanks to the supplies that my mom gave me for scaring off bullies.
Bryan: Oh, thank you! You know, not many people appreciate me just because of how nerdy I am. Beneath my dorky exterior is the heart and brain of a comic book illustrator and an artist.
Sally: Wow, that's good to hear!
Ash: I think we're gonna get along fine.
Bryan: Oh, just wait until you meet the rest of my friends.
Mary: Here you go, good as new.
Kid: Wow, thank you, Mary!
Kimmy: (as she walks up to the group going inside the school) That was very nice of you to take care of that bully. I'm Kimmy.
Sally: Pleased to meet you. Here's what I brought with me to school. (pulls out a bird cage with Stan disguised as a parrot) Ladies and gentlemen, meet Stan the parrot.
Stan: Hi, kids!
Ash: A parrot? No way!
Bryan: What's with the crown and glasses, Stan?
Stan: I'm one of the most intelligent birds out there!
Bryan: That doesn't explain the crown, though.
Kimmy: Aren't parrots also the most annoying birds?
Stan: No, not me. Sally and his sister Mary taught me how to talk to other people by making me read books.
Lawrence: Cool bird, Sally.
Sally: Thanks!
Stephanie: Nice to meet you! I'm Stephanie Logan.
Bryan: She's my girlfriend.
Ash: Wow, you must be a lucky boy, Bryan, because she's really pretty!
Kimmy: It's good to see you again, Stephanie. Cute sweater.
Stephanie: Thank you, Kimmy.
Wendell: Hi!
Sally: Get lost, Wendell, no one likes you!
Wendell: Oh, come on! (leaves)
Sally: Wendell's father is Dr. Bender, the most demented dentist in Dimmsdale.
Ash: My dad took me to him once to fix a broken tooth of mine, and it was a very unpleasant visit.
Stephanie: Oh, here comes Xavier.
Xavier: How's it going, guys?
Kimmy: (shoves the kids out of the way) Get outta my way, I need to see the most popular kid in this school, Xavier Tennyson!
Xavier: Kimmy, I'm flattered, but it's best for us to just move along to class.
Emma: You heard the boy, let's get moving! I'm Emma Johnson, by the way.
Ivette: And I'm Ivette Ubetcha.
Sally: The daughter of the news anchorman Chet Ubetcha?
Ivette: That's right! (sighs) And, this school is named after my late mother, Lyra Ubetcha.
Sally: What happened to her?
Ivette: (sheds a tear) She died of a terminal illness...
Stan: Ouch, now that's depressing.
Kimmy: No kidding.
Ash: Let's just get to Mr. Jewls' class, okay?
Kids: Okay.
(the kids all go to Mr. Jewls' class)

Mr. Jewls: Good morning, class. I'm Mr. Jewls. I've got a special treat for you today. We're going to learn about the joy of exploring the Internet!
(the kids cheer)

(when Ash spots Zack in school)
Ash: Dad?! What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at work?
Zack: Well, son, I got fired from the government.
Ash: That's no excuse to come to my school. Why are you fired from the government and are you trying to humiliate me?
Zack: I don't know why I got fired, and I just came to see how you're doing at school in 5th grade. And maybe have a look at your friend's parrot.
Ash: I'm doing fine, but you better keep your hands, and your eyes, for that matter, away from Sally's parrot!
Zack: (angrily) Why you-! (calms down) It's okay, son, I'll just stay away from you until your classes are over. (leaves via window)
Ash: Thank you. (to Sally) My dad is nuts.
Sally: Wait, so you're Zack Harrison's son?!
Ash: Yes. Don't worry, I'm not deranged like him. Sally, I have a question for you.
Sally: What is it, Ash?
Ash: Why did my dad get fired from the government?
Sally: It's because he wanted to expose the existence of fairies to the U.S government.
Ash: Are you telling me that your parrot is actually a...
Sally: (covers Ash's mouth) Shh! (whispering) Yes, my parrot is actually a fairy who can grant wishes. Don't tell anyone, okay?
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